“How real are you being with yourself?”

This is a powerful question when you take it seriously and honestly.

You may have reached a place in your life where you’re at a crossroads. You’re in the wrong career, but you’re scared to leave. You’re in an unhappy relationship, but you’re afraid you won’t find anyone else. You’re overweight, but you don’t have the willpower to lose it. And the list goes on…

I still have these moments. Particular areas of my life signal me to wake up and correct my course before the iceberg hits. The question is – “Am I ready to drop my mask and face my truth?”

It comes down to choice as always and how you want to perceive things. What are you gaining from remaining stuck in this situation?

I’d like to share with you an excerpt from my book “Letters to Mitch – The Healing Power of Grief, Love & Truth” on self-doubt and the masks we wear. Hopefully, it will make you question areas of your own life that need attention.

 

REFLECTION: MITCH TEACHES ME TO HANDLE SELF-DOUBT

“LIFE BECOMES A prison behind a mask. The essence of who we are grabs the bars of the cell around our spirit and shakes them ferociously. Let me out, let me out, let me out! We try to please other people. We live someone else’s life. Unfortunately, it takes a hard hit like loss to bring us to our knees where we’re asking life’s bigger questions.

Losing a loved one to suicide or tragedy can be the trigger to face the truth of yourself. The question is – are you willing to go there? What are you hiding beneath the surface? What’s begging to be let out? What are you afraid of and why? Are you willing to face the truth and discover what’s possible for your life?

I knew there was something extraordinary for me to explore after Mitch left us. The temptation, though, was to distract myself. What would I find? Who would I see? Looking within was going to be too painful, I said to myself in the beginning. And so it was. I pretended that none of it was happening and I became angry, cynical, and indulgent.

But when I suppressed my authentic self, I was living in denial of who I was, with all my flaws and insecurities. I became the man with the mask. My mask became my prism and all the qualities that made up the whole of me screamed to be let out, while I remained trapped. The problem is, if we don’t investigate our authentic selves, including our shadow, it becomes a force capable of destroying our lives and the lives of our family. Take it from me. What you reject about yourself and what you bury will ultimately use you to your own detriment. It might manifest as addiction, lack of clarity, confused thinking, relationship problems, and lack of self-love. Long story short, you won’t be living in the honest rhythm of your own heartbeat.

My suggestion is to use it. Whatever you buried has to come to the surface in order to be released. Once you seek the benefits of the totality of who you really are, you will have endless opportunities for growth. When you reject your reality, your authenticity, your true self will war against you and keep you struggling.

When you really look at grief and challenge, you can begin to see enlightened experiences that will show us who we really are. This kind of discovery teaches you to be more compassionate and forgiving so you can live in perfect balance and order. I have no doubt that Mitch was sent as a guide for me to release my authentic self. It was time for me to stop wasting time, to stop being the false man behind the mask, and start being who I really was as I embraced my the light and my darkness. When you live from your truth, you serve the world. When you show up with love on your chosen path and show the world who you are, it is reflected right back at you. Be fearless, be a creator, and understand that everything that happens to you in your life is an opportunity for growth.

You’ve suffered, you’ve grieved, you’ve been through pain, you’ve worn the masks. So what are you going to do with all this? What are you getting from remaining stuck in that situation? What are you avoiding? Trust that there is a divine recipe just for you. Use your suffering to take you one step closer to knowing how you can serve this world. When you find your truth, you find your freedom. When you find your freedom, everyone can bask in the GREATNESS that is you.

 

Letters to Mitch is available for pre-order on Amazon Kindle here.